If you have ears or in this case eyes you have definitely heard me talk about wanting to grow our family. Wanting and needing to get pregnant more than I wanted or needed air. I wanted our family to become a family of five. To me that feels complete.
I had baby fever and in a baaaad way. Well I'm stating right here and now that the said baby fever is so O-V-E-R. For real.
I was recently in a Buy Buy Baby buying a shower gift and you know what? All that cute little baby stuff didn't look cute at all to me. Not one single bit. I think it is safe to say baby fever is kind of gone. All that stuff just looked like one big expensive mess that was going to cost me a shit ton and clutter up my house. You don't even use it for that long. I walked away not really wanting any of it.
Kelly and I are kind of on the train of lets see what happens after summer.
I mean we spent two months giving it a true go. I'm still not on my birth control (I considered starting up again) and had a little plus sign blessed those many sticks of mine I would have been so so so very happy! But that didn't happen and now that phase is kind of gone for me.
All the thinking and acting and trying has kind of made me want to focus on me. Focus on the girls and Kelly and be happy as the four of us for a little while.
Just us four. I'm good with that for awhile.
So if you see me out and about drinking or are peeking in my windows just know if I have a drink in hand I am totally NOT pregnant.
Someday- maybe? But just not right now.
Ah it comes in waves.. I was ALL ABOUT IT... until I got pregnant lol. Then suddenly I only could see the bad and thought Oh no.. I made a huge mistake!
ReplyDeleteThankfully it goes away and you are back to baby gushing haha. Its the best!
HI my friend. As hard as this is to say because It is hard for me to do - take it easy don't care about, don't think about it. If it is meant to be it will. I am on the no baby bandwagon. I was never that person that had to be pregnant and baby fever forget. I love that our kids are getting older, independent.
ReplyDeleteI will keep thinking of you xoxo
that baby fever does come and go in waves. it did for me. i was happy with the independence then i'd be sad and wanted a baby. wherever your life takes you, i pray that it will be meant to be and you'll be at peace. either way, girl, you've got a great life and a wonderful family who loves you! and if you need a baby fix, you know where i live! :-)
ReplyDeleteI've had the fever pretty bad lately too, this I'm sure you know. But this week Jackson has reverted to the sleep hours of a newborn and it has pretty quickly gotten rid of my baby fever! ha! Maybe I should take a trip to Buy Buy Baby to get rid of that last bit of fever that's hangin on ;)
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you are in a good spot. It's so nice to sort of give up that sense of urgency and just be in the moment with those around you. I'm working on it right now myself!
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